WASTEISOLATION

by Black Dresses

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1.
DOORWAY 01:38
(dizzy) middle always in the middle i cant see the middle i cant see the light i cant see the dark standing in the doorway i cant see ur form cos im staring at the door staring at ur shadow listen to ur wish i can feel ur thoughts but i cannot feel ur kiss life is such a trip yea im on some shit i wanna touch ur hand but my hand just seems to miss standing in the doorway born inside a doorway lived inside a doorway took a shit inside a doorway standing in the doorway lived inside a doorway fucked inside a doorway fell in love inside a doorway
2.
GO INSIDE 02:14
(dizzy+rook) ull never find a way out (someday you wont recognize me) ull never find a way out (someday you wont recognize me) ull never find a way out (someday you wont even know who i am) ull never find a way out (i live for that day) (dizzy) yea i eat the ashes yea i eat the bones yea i know the people yea i know the ones why cos god tells me why cos god tells me why cos god tells me why yea i eat the ashes yea i chew the bones yea i know the people yea i know the ones why cos god tells me it could be whatever it doesnt matter even if i get it wrong sometimes i think that im dreaming sometimes i know that im not sometimes i think its a matter of fact sometimes i think its just tied up in a knot it could really be whatever (rook) it can go inside you it can unwind you it can rewire you force-feminize you you'll never be who you thought you were, true "EVERYTHING'S SEE-THROUGH!!" trust me, i feel u memories steal you present tense, weird too who is this geared to? nobody near you i think i fear you i think i fear you i know you're scared of me so i'm scared too the difference is... i don't want to kill you (dizzy) it could it could it could wear ur skin it could dig right in it could go inside of u it could wear ur skin it could dig right in it could go inside of u
3.
(dizzy) i live in sickness i live in spinning the whole wide world is a carousel i stood in line and now the ride's beginning i could still do so much more if i dont kill myself i live in nausea eternal nausea in a spotlight shaped like a spiral im in the bible god's favorite idol cos the whole sick world loves to smile (dizzy+rook) i feel sick i still feel sick i still feel sick (dizzy) smile like a rainbow smile like a crescent moon just keep doing what ur doing just keep doing what ur doing smile like a crack in the earth like a curse like a corpse like a wound smile like a rainbow just keep doing what ur doing (rook) cum-stained black hoodie grey soul and static in my eyes try to see the future but i'm not sure if it applies by the water in a pissed-in miniskirt trying to see the world thru the anhedonia feels kinda like my soul is burnt too late, too late if only uhhh we're not like the other girls this shit's too evil to be stylish don't tell me this is too dramatic cause i LIVE INSIDE IT just fucking try it~ (dizzy+rook) i feel sick i still feel sick i still feel sick
4.
IN MY MOUTH 03:03
(dizzy) i wanna put u in my mouth i wanna crush u in my jaws i wanna i wanna put u in my mouth (dizzy+rook) i dont feel like i can be anything more than this (im gonna) i dont really want to be anything more than this (im gonna) i just wanna be whatever u want me to be (im gonna) i dont wanna have a soul (im gonna) i dont know what i am but i want u to show me (im gonna) i dont want to have the capacity to feel lonely (im gonna) i want u to destroy me so ill feel better (im gonna) i dont wanna leave this moment ever ever ever ever... (im gonna) (rook) I WANNA LEAVE THIS WORLD WITH YOU I WANNA BECOME SOMETHING BETTER WITH YOU I WANNA FUCK OUR BODIES INTO BROKEN SHELLS I WANNA LOSE OURSELVES FOREVER (dizzy) i wanna put u in my mouth i wanna crush u in my jaws i wanna i wanna put u in my mouth right in my mouth right in my head ill never let u out never let u in my mouth in my head in my soul i want u there (rook) I WANNA LEAVE THIS WORLD WITH YOU I WANNA BECOME SOMETHING BETTER WITH YOU I WANNA FUCK OUR BODIES INTO BROKEN SHELLS I WANNA GO TO HELL TOGETHER (dizzy) i wanna put u in my mouth
5.
(dizzy) tell me how u feel tell me how u feel i dont know whats real i dont know whats real tell me how to feel tell me whats really u tell me how to feel i will feel it too AAA!! (rook) i want to replace myself with the best parts of you i don't want to be anything close to what i knew (dizzy) tell me how u feel tell me how u feel i dont know whats real i dont know whats real tell me how to feel whats really u? tell me what to feel i will feel it too (rook) i want to empty out my mind and make it something i can use i want to burn away my childhood and scatter something new it doesn't matter if i die i'm going to become something true tell me how you feel so i can take your soul from you (dizzy) AAA!!
6.
(rook) is there any truth to what you tell me you know about me? i don't wanna underestimate your intellect but something tells me there is something more to this go ahead & escape, a couple times a day, will do you good but don't forget to bring yourself back to what youre terrified of every single day ...yeah she's okay i am not like you i wanna forget myself and be lied to i don't know if anything is right i'm just a girl who can't look herself in the eye (dizzy) i am not like you i wanna forget myself and be lied to i don't know if anything is right i'm just a girl who can't look herself in the eye (rook) and in my dreams i am somewhere where i can fall apart i can think nothing and only feel what i need to (dizzy) who fuckin knows whats up? who the fuck knows whats up? who really knows whats up? who the fuck knows whats up? thank god thank god im not gay thank god thank god im not scared thank god its not fucking happening thoughts and prayers thoughts and prayers thank god thank god im not gay thank god that i dont know anything thank god thank god im not scared thoughts and prayers thoughts and prayers its the fucking worst isnt it? its so fucking cursed isnt it? its a fucking curse int it? "thoughts and prayers" "thoughts and prayers" these bitches just wanna watch us die they wanna pray over our dead bodies alive (rook+dizzy) LEAVE US ALONE WE DONT WANNA FUCKING HURT ANYONE WE JUST WANNA FEEL ANYTHING BEFORE WE'RE DONE LEAVE US ALONE WE JUST WANNA HAVE CONTROL OF OUR LIVES WE JUST WANNA GET OFF AND FEEL SAFE AND DIE (rook) and in my dreams i am somewhere where i can fall apart i can think nothing and only feel what i need to (rook+dizzy) everything is movement everything is hypochondriac and pieced together from the fragments of losing sight of what i thought you wanted me to be though i've tried and it almost killed me you cannot know this. you cannot pretend to be close with me psychosis batters at ur worldview & gnosis whoa it's only been a minute and a moment and you're already done~?? this is praxis. do you have anything to fight back with? no you lack it am i making you worry? is ur vision getting blurry? yeah youre gonna need glasses i burn so fucking bright but ur eyesight only sees ashes i am long past this post-traumatic, manic consciousness blasted look in my eyes and see the person you damaged (rook) and in my dreams i am somewhere where i can fall apart i can think nothing and only feel what i need to pick urself off the floor and look urself in the eye (rook+dizzy) LEAVE US ALONE WE DONT WANNA FUCKING HURT ANYONE WE JUST WANNA FEEL ANYTHING BEFORE WE'RE DONE LEAVE US ALONE WE JUST WANNA HAVE CONTROL OF OUR LIVES WE JUST WANNA GET OFF AND FEEL SAFE AND DIE
7.
IM EARTH 02:43
(dizzy) i got the nuked out brain im earth im in the shit im in the dirt im so boring put the girls to sleep i run away but they keep following (rook) my soul wont stop producing slime i feel it in me all the time can i have another one recycle mine melt into the earth and fertilize (dizzy) i got the nuked out brain im earth i am the worstest of the worst im so boring put the girls to sleep they think its funny but im never free (rook) what did i do to incur a body that just screams & dies & hurts i feel like a kind of human curse annihilation is my thirst
8.
WIGGLE 03:57
(dizzy) i couldnt go i couldnt stay i couldnt... i couldnt... they tried to push me down but i just wiggled around until they couldnt hold me years and years they couldnt hold me if u turn the light on ill just run away i know i dont belong but i have nowhere else to stay im so sorry im here im so sorry im here please dont kill me please dont kill me im so sorry im here right into the heart of my dreams someone else is just trying to crush me but its okay its okay if i was u if i was a killer id just kill me too (rook) i keep myself together somehow (i dont want anything i just want to survive) stepped on too many times to count (i know i'm nothing to you, i know i'm not even alive) i hope one day my broken frame (i'm sorry that i scare you, i'll find a better place to hide) can get away, can find a place (i'll crawl into the corner, stay out of the light) that's safe (dizzy) is it really like u say? does it really come in waves? does it really work that way? i know ur something different u cant hide it u cant miss it (rook) i keep myself together somehow (i dont want anything i just want to survive) stepped on too many times to count (i know i'm a target for you, i know you don't even think twice) i hope one day my broken frame (i'm sorry that i scare you, i promise that i'll make it right) can get away, can find a place (some perfect day i know i'll no longer be part of your life) that's safe i couldnt go i couldnt stay i couldnt go i couldnt stay i couldnt stay i didnt stay.
9.
DREAMING 03:47
(dizzy+dolores) sometimes i think that im dreaming sometimes i think that im dead sometimes i think that im dreaming in ur head in ur head (rook) sometimes i don't understand how i can see reality as anything but something far away from what i think is me i try to touch the surface but i cannot touch, only see the picture is distorted with the static noise of sleep "but i'm awake" i don't believe myself not really, i feel someone else deciding what to do and feel and speak cause i cant touch whats right in front of me wake her up she's stuck inside a dream wake me up i'm stuck inside a dream (dizzy+dolores) sometimes i think that im dreaming sometimes i think that im dead sometimes i think that im dreaming in ur head in ur head (dizzy) it feels like reaching up thru a mirror world it feels like reaching thru liquid glass i dont know where i am at all oh no i dont know where ive been and im scared to ask but thats ok thats ok i dont need to know anything i dont need to be anywhere at all its ok oh its so ok its just a dream its not real its not real its not real (dizzy+dolores) sometimes i think that im dreaming sometimes i think that im dead sometimes i think that im dreaming in ur head in ur head
10.
LEGACY 03:26
(dizzy) why thank u for ur opinion what u think is so important so lets talk this out i love it ur so funny i hope ur doing well thank god for the tongue in ur mouth im so happy im so lucky i get to do whatever i can be myself but u know what i have zero tolerance for bad little shit heads who only seem to fuck around same shit different day u need to fuck off u need to go away i dont wanna talk about it thats all that i came to say get out of my space u worthless fucking fuck face (dizzy+rook) WHO THE FUCK DO U THINK U ARE?! (dizzy) hey bitch what the fucks going on? is this how u wanna spend the last few years of ur life? of ur life? the last few years... ur legacy ur legacy ur legacy... ur... u can hide out in ur tiny little lair u can be the fucking evil monster terror scared u can be the evil monster it was always u it was always u it was always u it was always u it was always u (rook) it was always something i couldn't be that was just outside reality it was always something i couldn't know that i didn't know that i shouldn't show because everything around me felt just like a bad dream it was all or nothing be the kind of person you hate or be hated for the things that u thought were common sense just a little further one day it will make sense hold urself a little tighter ur innocence (dizzy) PREYED UPON AND VILLIFIED BY UR BLOOD AND FRIENDS!! (rook) who am i if i cant assign a name and place to what this is everything that's mine feels ROTTEN from the touch of it everything all the time is a message that i shouldn't be who the fuck are you? STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME i want to love myself but memories are killing me i want to live but all the years that came before wont let me be i want to love myself but memories are killing me i want to live but all the years that came before wont let me be i want to love myself but memories are killing me i want to live but all the years that came before wont let me be i want to love myself but memories are killing me memories are killing me memories are killing me it HURTS!!!!!!!
11.
RUNNER 04:24
(rook) I COULD BE ANYTHING I WANT I COULD BE SOMEWHERE FAR AWAY I COULD MAKE PEACE WITH WHAT IM NOT I COULD BE REAL AGAIN SOMEDAY......REAL AGAIN SOMEDAY i dont really know myself i dont really believe myself i dont really know why i see rotten things inside myself i dont really understand a single thing that's said to me "i don't really care who you are or what you think of me!!" ...but that's so fucking untrue when no one's listening (rook+dizzy) PUT ME UNDER I WANT TO GET AWAY I WONDER IF I COULD MAKE IT SHE'S A RUNNER I HEAR SHE FUCKS WITH SOMETHING OTHER YOU DONT KNOW THE HALF OF IT!!! (dizzy) im just a pain that hurts too much inverted shadow time delay mirror image of something that i never really even was heterosanity able-bodied lcd display but im lost in the world so different so unsuited for it (fuck) so sick so fucked up in it (fuck) so doomed so dead so... FUCK!!!!!!! (rook) i'll get away and i'll be all that i dreamed of i'll become everything that you were so scared i would be i'll push the limits of what you thoughts i was capable of you'll never see me again I KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME..... (rook+dizzy) PUT ME UNDER I WANT TO GET AWAY I WONDER IF I COULD MAKE IT SHE'S A RUNNER I HEAR SHE FUCKS WITH SOMETHING OTHER YOU DONT KNOW THE HALF OF IT!!! (rook) this anger burns out too quick to hold i wanna be engulfed but i'm out in the cold am i a character in some sick fantasy that's getting old? what happens from now on if it turns out i never told you? i want to start again i want this hurt to die iwant it to destroy me so i'll have a reason not to lie i want to hear ur voice and tell u its the last time ever i want to cut away i want to separate and sever i could be anything i want i could be somewhere far away i could make peace with what im not i could be real again someday...... REAL AGAIN SOMEDAY i'm going to start again i'm going to start again.
12.
WOUND 02:55
(rook) listen. i don't want to go here listen. i don't want to go here this is almost as bad as going back there listen, i can't, i can't go here this is a wound and it's closing this is a wound, please let it there is a wound called knowing what it's like to feel this please don't open it up again please don't fucking touch me please don't talk to me that way please don't try to love me someone opened it up again someone fucking touched me someone scared me out of my mind tore the wound right open and shoved me in every time it happens i don't think that i can get off the floor i don't even feel like those memories are mine anymore i don't know your motive but i just want to get out of this mess please just get your hand off of my dick and your voice out of my head. i remember trusting, i remember trusting you now that's something i don't think that i could ever do it wasn't that bad, i don't even know what you meant but given my age, i think the least important thing was intent (rook+dizzy) the truth is i don't want to know what happened to me just wanna kill all the memories of those years dig out grey matter, bleed out everything that is left from when i had to stop believing in safety
13.
SLITHER 05:23
(rook) 1. we slithered out of your reach. all of us had someone like you to run from. our wings were clipped and our limbs were damaged but we crawled and picked our way out as far as we could. 2. we lived by the water. took care of something that made its home deep below the surface. the mother of the depths returned our kindness by giving us her flesh to sustain us. she was sick and diseased like we all were, but she kept us alive. 3. things settled and some of our feathers started to grow back, a different color than before. our bones began to heal - at new angles, but almost as strong as they used to be. we held each other close at night and whispered that things were different now. things were safe. we had to be reminded nightly, or else we'd forget. 4. you found us. you came while we were sleeping. you talked with warm familiarity and i threw up at your feet. you asked me what was wrong - sincere - and i couldn't answer. i wish it was easier to hate you. i wish you were a bad person, but instead i just think that i am for wanting that. 5. we drove you away, haltingly. i told you i needed more time as if i hadn't already decided what you were to me. i wish you knew what you did, but i don't want to tell you. it would be easier if you were something i had nightmares about instead of ugly, complicated dreams. i want to flatten you into a villain but i think that would only turn me into one. please leave me alone. i'm happy now. i'm happy here. please don't look for me. i promise i'm okay. please go. listen to me. i'm going to speak plainly i'm not going to say your name. i'm afraid because of what i know you won't mention all those years of horrible tension i don't think youre a monster, hardly i just think that you fucked up, badly i can never tell you what you did to me so i have to settle for this, i hope truly that you never hear these words that i'm speaking this is just for me as i'm healing. it's not my fault that my soul is a war that i don't want to say i love you on the phone anymore i blame you. but i don't want to hate you ...but maybe that's because i'm afraid to there is a memory of when i was young and i admired you so much. we got away but everything reminds us i admired you so much 6. what comes next? is there anything after? where will we go to now? who will we become? i wonder. i've never wondered before. ---- (dizzy) everything always changes but its always the same everything always changes it flickers like flames everything always changes dice roll to a different face everything always changes new skin new name everything always changes but its different sides of one thing everything always changes in a circle in a ring

about

by dizzy and rook
november 2017 - january 2018

"GO INSIDE" [OFFICIAL VIDEO]
youtu.be/g9hCztV6zr4

"IM EARTH" [OFFICIAL VIDEO]
youtu.be/POqVmh_RgWI

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released April 13, 2018

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Black Dresses Toronto, Ontario

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